I flexed my time and took off a little early so that Ben and I could take Audra on one last hike before heading to college. It was really nice to spend some time with her, and also really sad that our time with her before college is coming to a close.
After one of the worst summers of my life, school is starting. Here is hoping that getting into a routine will settle us down and bring some calm to this stormy and terrible time.
We went to a friend's wedding reception, and it was so wonderful to have something fun to celebrate. It's been a terrible and unbelievably hard few weeks, and it was nice to have something to celebrate and to have joy. I was grateful. Anna looked beautiful.
While in Seattle, we found time to go to Dash Point so Camille could find some seashells, and to Redondo, where it turned into a parking disaster and we left quickly very frustrated before heading to the airport.
Matt's celebration was beautiful, but hard. It was a good turn out, about 80 people. We had a memory sharing to start which was really sweet. That's when I handed out all the quilts I made. Zak didn't let go of his for the rest of the day which meant a lot to me.
With everything with Sophia, I wasn't much help. Stephanie, Melissa, and Mom and Dad did so much. The work they put into it was amazing, and it showed. The root beer floats (because Mat loved root beer) were a huge hit. Dad made homemade root beer- it was delicious.
There were games everywhere. The kids loved volleyball and karaoke. Mom and dad really wanted it to be a celebration, and I think they got out of it what they wanted. Cousins who I haven't seen in decades were there, and that was nice.
My mom commented previously, "This is the last time I get to buy something for Matt."
That hits pretty hard. This has been so hard. And while it was beautiful, it was a reminder of all that we have lost.
So I've been pretty weepy lately. I feel like grief is now my constant companion, and I haven't quite yet figured out how to walk with her.
It might take me some time to figure it all out.
